Why This Can't Be News:

The shocking revelation that Donald Trump has been flirting with Hariana Veras is sending shockwaves across the globe... or at least, it would if anyone actually knew who Hariana Veras was or cared about her beyond being a prop in Trump's never-ending ego-stroking fest. I mean, let's be real, she's probably just some random person he met while trying to escape the wrath of his latest Twitter tantrum or something. Anyway, according to reports (and by "reports" I mean Trump's own mouth), Hariana is "beautiful" and he wishes there were more women like her... which is code for "I want someone who will stroke my ego without question." Because, you know, that's the only kind of beauty he recognizes.